Monday, May 18, 2015

The M.Guy Tweet, May 10, 2015

1. The Bad News (Poverty) And Good News (Education) About Millennial Parent, The Wall Street Journal
Since 2009, the share of impoverished young people has been higher than at any other point in the past 25 years.

2. Fewer Educated Women Are Choosing To Skip Having Kids, PBS
However, childlessness among women between the ages of 40 and 44, regardless of education, is “at the lowest point in a decade,” the study says.

3. Census Bureau Decides To Keep Marriage Questions On Survey, Pew Research Center
Under pressure from academics and advocates, the U.S. Census Bureau has abandoned plans to delete a series of questions about marriage and divorce from its largest household survey.

4. Why Millennials Might Be Having Less Sex Than Their Parents, TIME
Even more shocking? The study says one in three 20-somethings have never had sex at all.

5. How Your Hometown Affects Your Chances of Marriage, New York Times
Spending childhood nearly anywhere in blue America — especially liberal bastions like New York, San Francisco, Chicago, Boston and Washington — makes people about 10 percentage points less likely to marry relative to the rest of the country.

6. Shared Finances Can Be A Thorny Issue If You’re Not Married, The Washington Post
[C]ouples acting under the influence of a romantic high can establish financial bonds before “they’ve developed a mutual and clear dedication to a future with each other,” Stanley said. “They are giving up options before making a choice.”

7. Improving Opportunity For Black Men: The Role Of Economics, Culture, And Policy [VIDEO], American Enterprise Institute
How can public policy and cultural attitudes help improve the prospects of black men, and what role do economic factors play?

For more, see here.

Monday, April 27, 2015

The M.Guy Tweet, Week of April 19, 2015

1. They Do: The Scholarly About-Face on Marriage, The Boston Globe
Recently, however, a wave of research from think tanks on the right and left, as well as scholars in social sciences like economics and sociology, has made a forceful new defense of the venerable institution.

2. Love at First Sight Is Real, If You Believe, Wall Street Journal
Romantic love’s intense desire for connection with the other person typically lasts 18 months to three years, experts say. Its evolutionary purpose is to help people pick one partner and bond in order to raise a child.

3. What I Learned About Love During My Years of Reporting on Weddings, The Washington Post
For 10 minutes each day, couples should “talk about something other than work, family, who does what around the house or your relationship.” . . . Anything that allows you to stop and connect and not just feel like business partners trying to make your way through a packed agenda.

4. Marriage Rates Keep Falling, as Money Concerns Rise, The New York Times
Though marriage was once a steppingstone to economic stability, young adults now see financial stability as a prerequisite for marriage. More than a quarter of those who say they want to marry someday say they haven’t yet because they are not financially prepared, according to Pew.

5. What Divorce Does to Women’s Heart Health, TIME
Women who divorced at least once were 24% more likely to experience a heart attack compared to women who remained married, and those divorcing two or more times saw their risk jump to 77%.

6. Sex, Race, Education and the Marriage Gap, Newsweek
There is a growing “marriage gap” in the United States. Marriage rates among the non-college-educated population have fallen sharply in the last few decades, and sharpest of all in the black population.

7. The Scientific Way Divorce Breaks Your Heart, Deseret News
"Marriage counseling is focused largely on younger couples. . . But these results show that marital quality is just as important at older ages, even when the couple has been married 40 to 50 years."

For more, see here.

Tuesday, April 14, 2015

The M.Guy Tweet, Week of April 5, 2015

1. Sex Education in Europe Turns to Urging More Births, New York Times
Christine Antorini, the Danish education minister, said in a statement that the government was now seeking “a stronger focus on a broad and positive approach to health and sexuality, where sexual health covers both joys and risks associated with sexual behavior.”

2. A Classic Prep For Parenthood, But Is The Egg All It's Cracked Up To Be?, National Public Radio
"It's just one of those assignments that really sticks with them. They remember how hard it is and the amount of care and responsibility involved."

3. The Sexually Conservative Millennial, The Atlantic
A majority of young people consider random sex morally wrong in some circumstances, and many of them consider it always wrong. So much for hookup culture.

4. More U.S. Women Are Going Childless, Wall Street Journal
Some Americans may now prefer life without children, though most still report in surveys that they want two kids. Others may be struggling to have children, or can’t afford expensive fertility treatments.

5. How to Avoid a Post-Wedding Letdown, New York Times
“If the couple’s primary focus is on the wedding day itself rather than the marriage, then a crash is inevitable,” Dr. Charnas said. “However, if the emotional investment can be shifted from the wedding to the marriage and the couple’s partnership, then the perspective changes and the wedding is cast in a new light.”

6. The 8 Most Common Reasons for Divorce, MSN
Seventy-three percent of couples said a lack of commitment was the main reason their marriage didn’t work. . . Thirty-five percent of men and 21 percent of women said they wished they, themselves, had worked harder in the marriage.

7. Don’t Be a Bachelor: Why Married Men Work Harder, Smarter and Make More Money, The Washington Post
Marriage has a transformative effect on adult behavior, emotional health, and financial well-being—particularly for men.  (Parenthood is more transformative for women.)

[Note: And if parenthood is notably transformative for women, we women should note that the optimal environment in which to raise our child, according to the research, is marriage. Marriage matters for us too.]

For more, see here

Monday, March 30, 2015

The M.Guy Tweet, Week of March 22, 2015

1. Minding the Nurture Gap, The Economist
The most important divide in America today is class, not race, and the place where it matters most is in the home. Conservatives have been banging on about family breakdown for decades. Now one of the nation’s most prominent liberal scholars has joined the chorus.

2. A Mission to Save Marriages, The Guardian
Nicky and Sila Lee help couples to stay together by running marriage courses. There's no counselling, no airing of dirty linen in public, no group therapy – and it seems to work.

3. For Richer or Poorer: The Challenges of Marrying Outside Your Class, The Washington Post
Though it shaped these couples’ lives, most people I spoke with swore they never thought about the class differences in their relationships, afraid that doing so made them, in the words of one source, “snotty.”

4. To Help Couples Get Married, Focus on Something Else, Family Studies
All of these examples suggest that change sometimes happens through indirection: in order to encourage a behavior, focus less on the desired behavior and more on the things that put a person on the path to that behavior.

5. Life Events That Can Lead to Divorce, ABC News
“If you stop prioritizing your marriage and allow it to play second fiddle to work, your partner will probably start to feel isolated and angry,” says Ochoa.

6. eHarmony Founder Talks Matchmaking in the Age of Tinder, The Wall Street Journal
I think under CEO Greg Waldorf, users started seeing us more like the other dating sites Match and Zoosk, when we’re really a social science site. We were never meant to be a dating site. We were meant to be a matchmaking site. 

7. Substance Abuse, Mental Illness, and Crime More Common in Disrupted Families, Family Studies
In the 2011-2012 National Survey of Children’s Health, 21 percent of children cared for by a divorced or separated mother had lived with someone—usually a parent or sibling—who “had a problem with alcohol or drugs.” This was five times higher than the rate for children cared for by married birth parents.

For more, see here.  

Monday, March 16, 2015

The M.Guy Tweet, Week of March 8, 2015

1. Daylight-Saving Time Is Bad for Your Relationships, Wall Street Journal
After a bad night’s sleep, studies show, we act more selfishly, become more volatile and impulsive and have a harder time dialing back our feelings.

2. Are LARCs the Solution to Nonmarital Childbearing?, Family Studies
In short, there is more to separating sex from children than preventing children—even when, like Sawhill, policy experts are seeking to prevent children as a humanitarian goal.

3. The State of Marriage in America Today, in 6 Charts and Maps, The Washington Post
The median age of first marriage today — 29 for men and 27 for women — is higher than it has been in more than a century.

4. A Report on the Instability and Economic Challenges of Black Families is Still Debated 50 Years Later, Deseret News
Wilcox said that Moynihan's agenda was quite progressive for its time and stressed not only bolstering family structure, but also strengthening employment opportunities for African-Americans, especially the men.

5. The Terrible Loneliness of Growing Up Poor in Robert Putnam’s America, The Washington Post
Putnam doesn’t dispute that we need to fix families to fix poverty. But he pairs that with the economic argument more often advanced on the left: that declining real wages and the disappearance of blue-collar jobs have undermined families. 

6. You Won't Believe How Much an Average Wedding in America Now Costs, Fortune
The price of weddings has jumped to a new all-time high, reaching an average $31,213 in 2014, new research says.

7. Getting Married Before Having Children ‘Boosts Chances of Staying Together’ – Study, The Telegraph
“The message of this research is clear. For any couple thinking of having children, their best chance of staying together in the long run is by getting married first.”  

For more, see here.  

Monday, March 2, 2015

The M.Guy Tweet, Week of February 22, 2015

1. Why Living Alone Is Dangerous to Your Health, Wall Street Journal 
Research shows that living life alone is as dangerous as smoking or obesity. And when it comes to the five most common cancers affecting men and women, being married provided a greater survival benefit than chemotherapy (the benefit was greater for men than women).

2. Knot Now: The Benefits of Marrying in Your Mid-to-Late 20s (Including More Sex!), The Washington Post
[I]f you’d like to maximize your marital happiness, your odds of having a couple of kids, and of forging common memories and family traditions, you might not want to delay marriage if the right person presents his or herself in your mid-to-late 20s.

3. How to Find Lifetime Love: 10 Secrets From Couples Married for Decades, Today
“Their view is that couples get into these grey periods after they’re married, where nothing interesting or exciting is going on and shaking it up with something adventurous is a good idea,” Pillemer said.

4. Young Adults Putting Off Marriage, Treating It As Capstone to Other Achievements, Deseret News
"What we found when we made them (assign values) was marriage was still the most important thing they anticipated being in their future," said Willoughby.

5. Family Income - Not Married Parents - More Apt to Impact Kids' Well-Being, NBC News
"Where we see the biggest changes in marriage rates and non-marital fertility isn't happening to everyone, it's mainly the disadvantaged."

6. Are All Divorces Necessary?, Family Studies
It is not a stretch to state that at least one of the partners in each of these couples would have said at the outset of our work together that they had irreconcilable differences. Yet two years after entering our project, 38 percent of couples were still married, most of them having successfully finished treatment.

7. Exploring The Metaphysics Of Love, National Public Radio
The first part says that romantic love can be characterized by its place in a social structure or framework. The second part says that biological states of human animals play out the roles currently defined by that social framework. 

For more, see here.  

Monday, February 16, 2015

The M.Guy Tweet, Week of February 8, 2015

1. Be There for a Friend’s Relationship Crisis, But Don’t Give Advice, Wall Street Journal
The most important skill for marital first responders is listening, Dr. Doherty says. . . Refrain from jumping to a conclusion, and remember: You are hearing just one side of the story.

2. How to Fight with Your Spouse Without Ruining Your Marriage, in 9 Steps, Washington Post
It’s never too late to apologize. By which I mean, when it’s obviously far too late for saying sorry to do any good at all, you still should.

3. To Fall in Love With Anyone, Do This, The New York Times
But despite all this, I’ve begun to think love is a more pliable thing than we make it out to be. Arthur Aron’s study taught me that it’s possible — simple, even — to generate trust and intimacy, the feelings love needs to thrive.

4. Taking Risks in Love, The New York Times
The second thing love requires is mindfulness — pure focus, and total engagement in the current activity. “While washing the dishes,” the Buddhist monk Thich Nhat Hanh teaches, “one should only be washing the dishes.”

5. Falling Marriage Rates Reveal Economic Fault Lines, The New York Times
In their analysis of census and Bureau of Labor Statistics data, they concluded that if married households today equaled the numbers seen in 1980, “the growth in median income of families with children would be 44 percent higher.”

6. Does Marriage Make You Happier?, Newsweek
Children born outside of marriage are roughly five times more likely to be poor compared to their peers in married-parent homes and are at risk for other negative outcomes.

7. How to Revive the American Dream In Blue-Collar America, Real Clear Markets
This same study finds that 37 percent of the decline in men's employment since the 1970s can be linked to declining marriage rates.

For more, see here