Monday, September 16, 2013
Monday, September 9, 2013
The M.Guy Tweet, Week of September 1, 2013
1. Failed Marriages, Fractured Minds, The Family in America: New Research
. . . [I]ndividuals who have suffered “divorce or job loss are up to 3 times more likely to develop a major depressive disorder than those without such event.”
3. Too Many Points of Contact, UK Marriage Newsletter
A survey of 24,000 married people found that using more than five channels (such as social media, texting, instant messaging, etc.) to communicate with your partner actually decreases relationship satisfaction.
3. Study Finds More Divorce After Longer Deployment, The San-Diego Union Tribune
Among those who married before the Sept. 11th terrorist attacks launched an era of combat, a 12-month war zone deployment increased the risk of divorce within three years of marriage by 28 percent.
4. When Women Outnumber Men on Campus: What It Means for Marriage, The Globe and Mail
The growing gender gap in education alone is not responsible [for] falling marriage rates, but it has worked to disenfranchise less-educated women from the marriage market excluding them, and their children, from the economic privileges that go hand in hand with marriage.
5. Divorces in Iowa Lowest Since 1968, Quad-City Times
“Family research shows that when there is financial hardship — and this is society-wide because of the recession — people just tend to maintain the status quo. . ."
6. Task Force Issues Recommendations for Reducing Childhood Poverty, Kansas Health Institute
". . . Government must be mindful of programs and policies that result in keeping individuals in poverty by disincentivizing full-time employment and marriage or incentivizing out-of-wedlock childbirths.”
7. Married Couples, Don't Forget to Date, CNN Parents
"Be disciplined about getting a sitter on a regular basis and taking time for just the two of you outside the home," says Dr. Seth, "and don't be shy about returning to some of the favorite places you used to go as a couple before kids."
For more, see here.
. . . [I]ndividuals who have suffered “divorce or job loss are up to 3 times more likely to develop a major depressive disorder than those without such event.”
3. Too Many Points of Contact, UK Marriage Newsletter
A survey of 24,000 married people found that using more than five channels (such as social media, texting, instant messaging, etc.) to communicate with your partner actually decreases relationship satisfaction.
3. Study Finds More Divorce After Longer Deployment, The San-Diego Union Tribune
Among those who married before the Sept. 11th terrorist attacks launched an era of combat, a 12-month war zone deployment increased the risk of divorce within three years of marriage by 28 percent.
4. When Women Outnumber Men on Campus: What It Means for Marriage, The Globe and Mail
The growing gender gap in education alone is not responsible [for] falling marriage rates, but it has worked to disenfranchise less-educated women from the marriage market excluding them, and their children, from the economic privileges that go hand in hand with marriage.
5. Divorces in Iowa Lowest Since 1968, Quad-City Times
“Family research shows that when there is financial hardship — and this is society-wide because of the recession — people just tend to maintain the status quo. . ."
6. Task Force Issues Recommendations for Reducing Childhood Poverty, Kansas Health Institute
". . . Government must be mindful of programs and policies that result in keeping individuals in poverty by disincentivizing full-time employment and marriage or incentivizing out-of-wedlock childbirths.”
7. Married Couples, Don't Forget to Date, CNN Parents
"Be disciplined about getting a sitter on a regular basis and taking time for just the two of you outside the home," says Dr. Seth, "and don't be shy about returning to some of the favorite places you used to go as a couple before kids."
For more, see here.
Monday, September 2, 2013
The M.Guy Tweet, Week of August 25, 2013
1. Marriage Lessons: Divorced Man's Top 20 Things to Do Differently, Herald Sun
Posted in late July, Rogers' frank and self-effacing list of marriage dos and don'ts has been shared and reshared by more than 350,000 people around the world, with more than 10,000 likes and hundreds of positive comments.
2. Is Forever Feasible, The Huffington Post
Many young people today begin to run off the road when they get the crucial success sequence wrong (get an education, then get married, then have children). Children whose parents have not followed this life course sequence are, on average, at much greater risk for poverty and poorer outcomes.
3. Children and Divorce: 'I Just Want to Know Why They Broke Up,' The Guardian
"You get the feeling in so many cases that it was easier to pack their bags and split up than to sit down and have a conversation," he says. And the big problem with that is, so many questions are left unanswered for the children at the centre of the split.
4. Keeping Marriage Going Strong Into Your Golden Years, Courier Journal
Individuals can remedy this by doing more things on their own, whether spending time apart with friends or engaging in hobby time without your spouse. . . Brief periods of separation can make the time married couples do spend together feel more meaningful.
5. Why Marriage is (Still) a Vital Pathway to Independence, National Fatherhood Initiative
What parents often neglect, however, is to send a clear message about the importance of marriage—not only its importance as the ideal situation in which to raise children, but how vital it is to parents’ and their children’s eventual independence from one another.
6. Reduce Childhood Trauma & Adult Health Problems By Teaching Healthy Relationship Skills to Parents, Pioneer Pitch Day
This new approach of teaching at-risk parents the skills necessary to form and sustain long-term, stable romantic relationships to prevent childhood trauma is a primary prevention approach with much potential.
7. The Health Benefits of Gratitude, Meghan Telpner Nutritionista
A wide cross-section research shows that people who feel more appreciated by their partners are more likely to stay committed. So don’t forget to say thank you to your sweetie for doing the dishes, or the laundry, or packing you a delicious lunch.
For more, see here.
Posted in late July, Rogers' frank and self-effacing list of marriage dos and don'ts has been shared and reshared by more than 350,000 people around the world, with more than 10,000 likes and hundreds of positive comments.
2. Is Forever Feasible, The Huffington Post
Many young people today begin to run off the road when they get the crucial success sequence wrong (get an education, then get married, then have children). Children whose parents have not followed this life course sequence are, on average, at much greater risk for poverty and poorer outcomes.
3. Children and Divorce: 'I Just Want to Know Why They Broke Up,' The Guardian
"You get the feeling in so many cases that it was easier to pack their bags and split up than to sit down and have a conversation," he says. And the big problem with that is, so many questions are left unanswered for the children at the centre of the split.
4. Keeping Marriage Going Strong Into Your Golden Years, Courier Journal
Individuals can remedy this by doing more things on their own, whether spending time apart with friends or engaging in hobby time without your spouse. . . Brief periods of separation can make the time married couples do spend together feel more meaningful.
5. Why Marriage is (Still) a Vital Pathway to Independence, National Fatherhood Initiative
What parents often neglect, however, is to send a clear message about the importance of marriage—not only its importance as the ideal situation in which to raise children, but how vital it is to parents’ and their children’s eventual independence from one another.
6. Reduce Childhood Trauma & Adult Health Problems By Teaching Healthy Relationship Skills to Parents, Pioneer Pitch Day
This new approach of teaching at-risk parents the skills necessary to form and sustain long-term, stable romantic relationships to prevent childhood trauma is a primary prevention approach with much potential.
7. The Health Benefits of Gratitude, Meghan Telpner Nutritionista
A wide cross-section research shows that people who feel more appreciated by their partners are more likely to stay committed. So don’t forget to say thank you to your sweetie for doing the dishes, or the laundry, or packing you a delicious lunch.
For more, see here.
Monday, August 26, 2013
The M.Guy Tweet, Week of August 18, 2013
1. Relationship Footprint [Visual], Fatherhood Channel
How deep is your relationship footprint? [Click on visual]
2. Money To Matrimony: Talking About The Black Experience, National Public Radio
[T]hey make their own money, they live their own life, they own their own home. They don't necessarily see where you need a man for that, but what they do need a man for is for the companionship, for the partnership, for the fact that they might want a family. So that was an interesting aspect of the survey to me.
3. Has Marriage Gotten Too Expensive?, The Washington Post
“They found that as the American workforce and the American marriage have destabilized over the past half-century, marriage has become an increasingly inaccessible option for working-class Americans. . ."
4. The Soft Break-Up, Sliding vs. Deciding
As is so often the case, technology brings a vast number of options but this also makes choices more important (and more difficult). Friends are great to have, but a gallery of past loves is a pretty complicated audience for a new stage of life.
5. Marriage Advice: If You Remarry, Make Sure It Is For The Right Reason -- Love, News-Sentinel
Marrying to escape a bad situation or a boring life is “a terrible basis for marriage.” The Parrotts describe this as “perhaps the most damaging motivation for remarriage.” Strong marriages are based on loving bonds that pull people together, not on an effort to escape something else.
6. HRC Marriage and Children, Healthy Relationships California
“[I]ncreasing marital stability to the same level as in 1980 is associated with a decline of nearly one- half million children suspended from school, about two hundred thousand fewer children engaging in delinquency or violence, a quarter of a million fewer children receiving therapy, about a quarter of a million fewer smokers, about 80,000 fewer children thinking about suicide, and about 28,000 fewer children attempting suicide.”
7. Is Marriage Becoming A Status Symbol in America, The Week
Their findings suggest that instead of a major moral or cultural shift (like growing acceptance of unmarried couples living together), it might be a general lack of job security that is the big dissuader. Today, there are fewer stable, well-paying jobs for those without a college degree than in the past — take manufacturing or union jobs, for an example.
For more, see here.
How deep is your relationship footprint? [Click on visual]
2. Money To Matrimony: Talking About The Black Experience, National Public Radio
[T]hey make their own money, they live their own life, they own their own home. They don't necessarily see where you need a man for that, but what they do need a man for is for the companionship, for the partnership, for the fact that they might want a family. So that was an interesting aspect of the survey to me.
3. Has Marriage Gotten Too Expensive?, The Washington Post
“They found that as the American workforce and the American marriage have destabilized over the past half-century, marriage has become an increasingly inaccessible option for working-class Americans. . ."
4. The Soft Break-Up, Sliding vs. Deciding
As is so often the case, technology brings a vast number of options but this also makes choices more important (and more difficult). Friends are great to have, but a gallery of past loves is a pretty complicated audience for a new stage of life.
5. Marriage Advice: If You Remarry, Make Sure It Is For The Right Reason -- Love, News-Sentinel
Marrying to escape a bad situation or a boring life is “a terrible basis for marriage.” The Parrotts describe this as “perhaps the most damaging motivation for remarriage.” Strong marriages are based on loving bonds that pull people together, not on an effort to escape something else.
6. HRC Marriage and Children, Healthy Relationships California
“[I]ncreasing marital stability to the same level as in 1980 is associated with a decline of nearly one- half million children suspended from school, about two hundred thousand fewer children engaging in delinquency or violence, a quarter of a million fewer children receiving therapy, about a quarter of a million fewer smokers, about 80,000 fewer children thinking about suicide, and about 28,000 fewer children attempting suicide.”
7. Is Marriage Becoming A Status Symbol in America, The Week
Their findings suggest that instead of a major moral or cultural shift (like growing acceptance of unmarried couples living together), it might be a general lack of job security that is the big dissuader. Today, there are fewer stable, well-paying jobs for those without a college degree than in the past — take manufacturing or union jobs, for an example.
For more, see here.
Tuesday, August 20, 2013
The M.Guy Tweet, Week of August 11, 2013
1. I Do ... Cost a Lot: Weddings By The Numbers, CNN
$28,427: Average cost of a wedding in the United States in 2012, according to data from the 2013 Real Weddings Survey by TheKnot.com of 75,000 brides.
2. Marriage Is the New Middle-Class Luxury Item, Slate
Many of the working-class Americans interviewed by Silva and Corse are now too concerned with maintaining their “own survival” to “imagine being able to provide materially and emotionally for others.”
3. Marriage Beyond Reach of Many Working-class Americans, MyFoxWasau
Job insecurity and uncertainty about the future may be a key part of what's keeping many working-class Americans from getting or staying married, a new study suggests.
4. Family And Religion Play A Critical Role In Economic Mobility, Business Insider
"For instance, high upward mobility areas tend to have higher fractions of religious individuals and fewer children raised by single parents," the researchers write. "Each of these correlations remained strong even after controlling for measures of tax expenditures."
5. 'Hookup Culture' Isn't Real, The Atlantic Wire
77 percent of today's students said they had a regular partner or spouse, while 85 percent said the same in the earlier generation. Monto attributes this slight decline to the "change in age of marriage."
6. Your Siblings Are Saving Your Marriage, Slate
While the difference between being an only child and one kid out of two or three is not enormous, says study co-author Doug Downey, “when you compare children from large families to those with only one child, there is a meaningful gap in the probability of divorce.”
7. The Goal, Children's Hope for Family Act
Recent studies offer conclusive evidence that about one third of couples entering the divorce process report an interest in reconciliation.
For more, see here.
$28,427: Average cost of a wedding in the United States in 2012, according to data from the 2013 Real Weddings Survey by TheKnot.com of 75,000 brides.
2. Marriage Is the New Middle-Class Luxury Item, Slate
Many of the working-class Americans interviewed by Silva and Corse are now too concerned with maintaining their “own survival” to “imagine being able to provide materially and emotionally for others.”
3. Marriage Beyond Reach of Many Working-class Americans, MyFoxWasau
Job insecurity and uncertainty about the future may be a key part of what's keeping many working-class Americans from getting or staying married, a new study suggests.
4. Family And Religion Play A Critical Role In Economic Mobility, Business Insider
"For instance, high upward mobility areas tend to have higher fractions of religious individuals and fewer children raised by single parents," the researchers write. "Each of these correlations remained strong even after controlling for measures of tax expenditures."
5. 'Hookup Culture' Isn't Real, The Atlantic Wire
77 percent of today's students said they had a regular partner or spouse, while 85 percent said the same in the earlier generation. Monto attributes this slight decline to the "change in age of marriage."
6. Your Siblings Are Saving Your Marriage, Slate
While the difference between being an only child and one kid out of two or three is not enormous, says study co-author Doug Downey, “when you compare children from large families to those with only one child, there is a meaningful gap in the probability of divorce.”
7. The Goal, Children's Hope for Family Act
Recent studies offer conclusive evidence that about one third of couples entering the divorce process report an interest in reconciliation.
For more, see here.
Monday, August 12, 2013
The M.Guy Tweet, Week of August 4, 2013
1. What are the Secrets to a Happy Life?, University of California, Berkeley
In short, it was a history of warm intimate relationships—and the ability to foster them in maturity—that predicted flourishing in all aspects of these men’s lives.
2. Mom Wants You Married? So Does the State, The New York Times
But in South Korea, fretful about plummeting birthrates but still tied to conservative ideas about matchmaking, solving the difficulties of the lovelorn has become something of a national priority.
3. Slicing ‘Breadwinner Moms’ Headlines, Charlotte Observer
Or, how different the reaction if the pitch had been that 25 percent of households with children under 18 are supported by a single mother. . . Especially considering that in these single-mother homes, the median income is $23,000 and that 44 percent are never-married moms.
4. Marriage and Minorities, The New York Times
“Unmarried couples in which the father has been incarcerated are 37 percent less likely to be married one year after the child’s birth than similar couples in which the father has never been incarcerated.”
5. Most in U.S. Want Marriage, but Its Importance Has Dropped, Gallup Economy
Although most Americans are married or would like to get married, less than two-thirds consider it very or somewhat important for a couple to marry if the two want to spend the rest of their lives together or when they want to have a child together.
6. One in Three U. S. Youths Report Being Victims of Dating Violence, Science Daily
"Both boys and girls who engaged in high rates of bullying toward other students at the start of the study were seven times more likely to report being physically violent in dating relationships four years later."
For more, see here.
In short, it was a history of warm intimate relationships—and the ability to foster them in maturity—that predicted flourishing in all aspects of these men’s lives.
2. Mom Wants You Married? So Does the State, The New York Times
But in South Korea, fretful about plummeting birthrates but still tied to conservative ideas about matchmaking, solving the difficulties of the lovelorn has become something of a national priority.
3. Slicing ‘Breadwinner Moms’ Headlines, Charlotte Observer
Or, how different the reaction if the pitch had been that 25 percent of households with children under 18 are supported by a single mother. . . Especially considering that in these single-mother homes, the median income is $23,000 and that 44 percent are never-married moms.
4. Marriage and Minorities, The New York Times
“Unmarried couples in which the father has been incarcerated are 37 percent less likely to be married one year after the child’s birth than similar couples in which the father has never been incarcerated.”
5. Most in U.S. Want Marriage, but Its Importance Has Dropped, Gallup Economy
Although most Americans are married or would like to get married, less than two-thirds consider it very or somewhat important for a couple to marry if the two want to spend the rest of their lives together or when they want to have a child together.
6. One in Three U. S. Youths Report Being Victims of Dating Violence, Science Daily
"Both boys and girls who engaged in high rates of bullying toward other students at the start of the study were seven times more likely to report being physically violent in dating relationships four years later."
Korea’s government-funded dating
7. Hiller Law Discusses Marriage Boosters with Good Morning America, PR.com
Korea’s government-funded dating
Korea’s government-funded dating
Korea’s government-funded dating
“We want marriages to last. I encourage all couples to create agreements
that include a plan to learn and maintain relationship skills,” said
Hiller. “I am delighted when clients call and tell me the postnuptial
agreement we created saved their marriage. . ."
Korea’s government-funded dating
For more, see here.
Tuesday, August 6, 2013
The M.Guy Tweet, Week of July 28, 2013
1. In Climbing Income Ladder, Location Matters, The New York Times
“Where you grow up matters,” said Nathaniel Hendren, a Harvard economist and one of the study’s authors. “There is tremendous variation across the U.S. in the extent to which kids can rise out of poverty.”
One reader's analysis: What Do These Maps Prove? Not What You Might Think
2. Marriage May Calm a Criminal Impulse in Men, Pacific Standard
[T]he men who divorced from their wives had an increase of 18 percent in their conviction rate from before the divorce, and the men who stayed married had a decrease of 80 percent in their conviction rate.
3. The Good Dad: The Transformative Power of Fatherhood for Men and Children, The Heritage Foundation
Drawing on his new book, Gender and Parenthood: Biological and Social Scientific Perspectives (Columbia, 2013), W. Bradford Wilcox will detail the ways in which fatherhood is a transformative experience for men, both biologically and socially.
4. Traditional Fatherhood Still Essential, The American Spectator
Fathers generally have firmer discipline tactics than mothers, and are more likely to encourage their children to embrace challenges. Boys with engaged fathers are less likely to be violent or delinquent, while girls are less likely to become sexually active or pregnant while teenagers.
5. Expert: Decline of Marriage Leads to Bad Outcomes for Children, Adults, The Washington Free Beacon
Men in residential marriages, on average, have lower levels of testosterone—which in high amounts is linked to aggression and infidelity—earn more than their counterparts without children, and are less likely to be depressed.
6. 4 Reasons Being Happily Married Could Make You A Better CEO, Forbes
In fact, researchers. . . found that non-married women have a 50% higher mortality rate than married women while non-married men have a remarkable 250% higher mortality rate than married men.
7. The Four Things That Kill a Relationship Stone Dead, PsychBlog
Amongst the factors he identified, four have stood out, time and time again. When Gottman sees a couple's communication overrun with these, the chances are they will divorce in an average of around six years from their marriage.
For more, see here.
“Where you grow up matters,” said Nathaniel Hendren, a Harvard economist and one of the study’s authors. “There is tremendous variation across the U.S. in the extent to which kids can rise out of poverty.”
One reader's analysis: What Do These Maps Prove? Not What You Might Think
2. Marriage May Calm a Criminal Impulse in Men, Pacific Standard
[T]he men who divorced from their wives had an increase of 18 percent in their conviction rate from before the divorce, and the men who stayed married had a decrease of 80 percent in their conviction rate.
3. The Good Dad: The Transformative Power of Fatherhood for Men and Children, The Heritage Foundation
Drawing on his new book, Gender and Parenthood: Biological and Social Scientific Perspectives (Columbia, 2013), W. Bradford Wilcox will detail the ways in which fatherhood is a transformative experience for men, both biologically and socially.
4. Traditional Fatherhood Still Essential, The American Spectator
Fathers generally have firmer discipline tactics than mothers, and are more likely to encourage their children to embrace challenges. Boys with engaged fathers are less likely to be violent or delinquent, while girls are less likely to become sexually active or pregnant while teenagers.
5. Expert: Decline of Marriage Leads to Bad Outcomes for Children, Adults, The Washington Free Beacon
Men in residential marriages, on average, have lower levels of testosterone—which in high amounts is linked to aggression and infidelity—earn more than their counterparts without children, and are less likely to be depressed.
6. 4 Reasons Being Happily Married Could Make You A Better CEO, Forbes
In fact, researchers. . . found that non-married women have a 50% higher mortality rate than married women while non-married men have a remarkable 250% higher mortality rate than married men.
7. The Four Things That Kill a Relationship Stone Dead, PsychBlog
Amongst the factors he identified, four have stood out, time and time again. When Gottman sees a couple's communication overrun with these, the chances are they will divorce in an average of around six years from their marriage.
For more, see here.
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